"Look closely at the present you are constructing;
it should look like the future you are dreaming"
 - Anne Walker

Dreaming my dream....

today i've learn

about the meaning behind this quote;

A conversation is a dialogue, not a monologue. That's why there are so few good conversations: due to scarcity, two intelligent talkers seldom meet.
Truman Capote
more quotes here

many times when i am at wit's end in a conversation because i am not able to express my overloading emotions in words, not as loud, not as fast talking, not as fast thinking.

i think over my sentences, construct them in my mind and sometimes a little longer. coz i don't want to be the insensible, sarcastic, wow-look-at-how-witty-i-am (not!) / razor-tongue self lover. Those snub, yuck!

Respect your standing, and other people's views as well, if you demand any respect at all.
Just like religion. Just because you believe in one God, it's doesn't mean others' beliefs are wrong at all.

Some odd 20 hours ago...

I posted this quote on my fb;
"The true hypocrite is the one who ceases to perceive his deception, the one who lies with sincerity."

It rings true to what was happening around me. It made me doubt about people in general. But I know those close to me. I care for them, just as much as they care for me. I know if he or she is being real,.. with time, I must add, that you will learn for their true genuine self.

On another note, I've removed friends' link and some pics here. Solely because I want to remain more anonymous here.
I will try to continue to blog more - writing more ramblings. Or not.

running, running...

I don't even know what I was running for - I guess I just felt like it.

- J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, Chapter 1

am still reading it... again.. have yet to finish it. i read it once, way too young to understand. was just aiming to reach the back cover. now i am reading it again.

another book i re-read is To Kill A Mockingbird. these classics have the power to pull you in the neck and twist your heart. certainly, it did that to me.

writing to me is...

Writing stopped being fun when I discovered the difference between good writing and bad and, even more terrifying, the difference between it and true art. And after that, the whip came down.
Truman Capote

I enjoy writing, sometimes; I think that most writers will tell you about the agony of writing more than the joy of writing, but writing is what I was meant to do.
Leon Uris


All I'm writing is just what I feel, that's all. I just keep it almost naked. And probably the words are so bland.
Jimi Hendrix

There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.
Ernest Hemingway

Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation.
Graham Greene

I think some aspects of writing can be taught. Obviously, you can't teach vision or talent. But you can help with comfort.
Toni Morrison

some of these quotes felt like how i am feeling inside. i hope it will continue to feed my hunger for writing, hunger to write something good.

That I am nobody but myself

All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was.

I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory.

I was naive. I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I,

and only I, could answer.It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with:

That I am nobody but myself.

Ralph Ellison, The Invisible Man

If tomorrow never comes

A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success.
'Never leave that 'til tomorrow,' he said,
'Which you could do today.'
This is the man who discovered electricity. You’d think more of us would listen to what he had to say.

I don’t know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I’d say it had a lot to do with fear.
Fear of failure.
Fear of pain.
Fear of rejection.

Sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you’re wrong. What if you make a mistake you can’t undo. Whatever it is we're afraid of, one thing holds true. That by the time the pain of not doing the thing gets worse than the fear of doing it. It can feel like we're carrying around a giant tumor.

The early bird catches the worm; a stitch in time saves nine.
He who hesitates is lost.
We can't pretend we haven't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to ‘seize the day'.
Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves.
We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore, until we finally understand for ourselves like Benjamin Franklin meant.
That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping.
And that even the biggest failure, even the worst most intractable mistake beats the hell out of never trying.

~MEREDITH GREY

Grey's Anatomy